9:47-9:53pm

For the most part I'm okay these days.
The weather's been gorgeous.
Allie's been waking me up with the cutest face.
And finally my closet's organized to perfection.
The boxes of shoes perfectly aligned.
And the ceiling fan repeatedly blows breezes in my face.
A constant reminder that Indian Summer is here.
September's almost over.
I have a test next week.
And I think it should be easy.
But right now.
It's 9:47pm.
And hot as hell.
And I miss you so much.
I'm hurting.
I'm sitting on my bed.
With a pillow in my lap.
Having it there at least gives me some sort of fake imaginary sense
of touch..
of feel.
And all I could ever ask for in this moment is to hear your voice.
And all that sounds appealing is to replay that night that I loved.
And all I want is for you.
I miss you.
I miss your laugh.
..being able to reach out to you
knowing you would reach back.
The colors of my covers haunt me.
The deep red.
My heart bled on these covers.
My heart bled when I loved you.
It's 9:53pm,
I miss you so unbearably much.
But I'll still fall asleep.
Just sometimes...
I still hurt.
'Cause sometimes...
I still love you.